Self Stupidity

So, time to fess up... Ever caught yourself mid-stream, realizing just how totally insane the thought you've just been entertaining is? Every once in a while, I actually become aware of some of the stupidest, most self-aggrandizing daydream that I have running through my head (as opposed most times, when I just blithely go on about my business, oblivious).

So, I was listening to The Dark Side by Jane Mayer this evening in the lab. The whole book's premise basically boils down to the concept that the soon-to-be past administration had a lot of misguided thoughts of their own about how best to defend our country against a terrorist threat and that it has led us down some pretty frightening paths. The book had just gotten to the section about how the administration has promoted the use of torture to interrogate prisoners of war (yeah... its kinda a downer).

So there is quite a lot of discussion about the various techniques of torture and the psychology behind them. What is it that causes our psyche to snap and give in to interrogation, and what are some of the most effective ways to push a person to the snapping-point?

So, Mayer is describing some of the sleep deprivation methods and how they are quite efficient at getting people to crack and I actually pause in my work to think "Huh. I bet if I were being tortured, I would be resistant to that sort of thing cuz I've had sleep apnea!!!!" Then I proceed to have visions of myself in some foreign equivalent of Abu Ghraib, solidly holding out against the cruel machinations of my evil tormentors while scores of hardened men crumple around me!

...

Yeah... Kinda embarrassing... I mean, seriously, I would be the absolute first one to break under any sort of pressure. I would spill my secrets before they even asked. I'd be all like: "But wait, wasn't lunchtime SUPPOSOED to be a couple hours ago?!?! Okay! I'll tell you whatever you want, just PLEASE give me that danish!"

I'd cave faster than my cellmate, Mr. Fluffles here:

Sherbert

So, you may have heard about my poor lil' hamster, Sherbert lately. In the last month or so, she has been about as sick as I have ever seen any of my hamsters get in the past. Huddling up in her little house and sneezing and such. I have to say, that as awful as it sounds, hamster sneezes are pretty adorable! But then later she started to cough and it was surprisingly loud and painful sounding coming from such a small body... Suddenly my jokes about her having hamster ebola seemed more prophetic than cute... I was pretty sure she wasn't gonna make it much longer when I took her back to Mighigan with me.

So, I've had her cage snuggled up against a space heater for quite a number of weeks now and had just about given up hope for any sort of recovery. I was sitting in bed just now, typing up my thesis and what should I see trundling across the floor out of the corner of my eye? Sherbert, up to her old con-artist escape acts once again! She seems pretty normal this evening, so maybe the old girl has a few more spins of the wheel left in her than I thought! Here she is, back in her old stomping grounds again.

Wish her luck in 2009! She'll need it!

Happy Holidays Everyone!

Whew! Back in Baltimore and gearing up for the home stretch! Thanks everyone from Michigan for making my Christmas and New Year’s another memorable experience. I feel relaxed and all juiced up again – ready to go for what will undoubtedly be a busy next few months!

Hope everyone had a great break themselves and a Happy New Year. God knows that I had a fabulous evening with my best buds in Michigan – though I think I am lucky to have escaped without a few “battle scars”…

Anywho. Best wishes for you all in 2009!

Argggggh!

My computer has crashed, maybe permanently...

:o(

I won't be posting for a bit...

Fate and Stereotypes

This is the face of the dog that Usman would like to get next, if there is ever to be a dog that will follow Zook. Adorable isn't it?

We've been bandying about names that we'd like to name our imaginary future dog and Usman is adamant that it should be named "Momo". Which I thought was perfectly fine and everything, mostly because I associate that name with a book written by my favorite childhood author, Michael Ende.

Then we were toying around with last names, because... of course... you know... a dog can't have just one name in this day and age... right?...

I playfully threw out the name Moochkins on a lark, and the name actually stuck. Usman is all excited about our future-dog-to-be, Momo Moochkins. And I am too, I love dogs and puppies, and feel bad that I have to leave Zook alone all the time... But then again, I have to admit that every once in a while I do stop and think that its all a little much. I have visions of me walking Zook the Cairn Terrier and Momo Moochkins the Lhasa apso around Baltimore or my future Boston neighborhood. Cuz you know, I'm not exactly the most butch specimen of the male species and all...

Anyway, I was thinking of this and had a flashback to this story, which is hilarious and told by Dan Savage, who is a wonderful gay icon and also has some great sex advice, should you be looking for some...

Check it out. And if you see me in the streets, try not to point and laugh, okay?

Please?




Length: 14:29
Original Show: #328 What I Learned From Television
www.thisamericanlife.org

Okay, Sorry....

Yeah... That last post was a bit raw and disturbing... Sorry 'bout that...

I did manage to import all of my posts from Live Journal, including some of the angsty ones, so I am pretty sure that my transition over to this forum is complete. However, the old posts didn't retain any of the formatting, and a number of the links are broken by now. So... I guess I'll just have to deal, because I don't really have much intent to go back and correct them right now.

For now, if I've just traumatized you with the last story, you can take a jog on over to Happy News:

http://www.happynews.com/index.aspx

Where they claim that every story has a positive spin.

A little about my actual life...

So... Since it has been forever since I've posted, I guess a bit of update is in order.

I have about 5 months left in my program. It will be "crunch time" very soon. But on the plus side, I am ready to move on and up. I will be working with Dr. Pam Silver in Boston (http://silver.med.harvard.edu/) come April/May. I am excited about the move and looking forward to Boston.

Also in new news, I have been told that I have sleep apnea and have probably had it for quite some time. While hardly some awful disease, it can cause some major disruptions in sleep patterns and lead to a host of downstream, very much more serious conditions. So, I am now on a CPAP machine while I sleep, which is basically this mask that goes on your face and provides positive air pressure to keep your windpipe open while you are sleeping.

Its not so bad really... It looks like it would be more uncomfortable than it really is... See, here is a picture of me reading in bed with my new CPAP machine and mask on:

Actually, though it does make me feel like an old man to be wearing something like this, the effects have been IMMEDIATE! I just got the thing this Monday. Already, in the 3 different seminars that I have sat through, I have not had any trouble staying awake. I've read papers and books, all without even getting drowsy. Which, for the last 4 years or so, is basically unheard of. It is a god-send and I am so excited about it. I may even go attempt to read a book in the tub again! (Those who have known me for a while, will know that pretty much all of my older books suffer from major water damage).

But generally, I am so happy with it, and hope that it continues. I have missed casual reading in a major way for the last few years!

Anyone read any good books lately?